4 friends, an Indonesian, a French, a Malay from Malaysia, and a Chinese from Malaysia, went hiking on a hill together. When they reached the top, the Indonesian took out a cigarette and started smoking halfway before throwing his pack of cigarettes down the hill. He said, "My country lacks of everything except of cigarettes."
Not to be outdone, the French took out an expensive bottle of fragrance, put it on, and threw the remaining down the hill. "My country lacks of everything except of fragrances."
When they both turned their heads to the Chinese, they looked in horror as the Chinese kicked his Malay friend down the hill. "My country ah, what also don't have, only have alot of Malays."
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Dating Malay, Chinese, and Indian chicks.
Malay girl
1st date: You get to hold hands
2nd date: You get a goodbye kiss.
3rd date: You both get caught by JAIS.
Chinese girl
1st date: You take her to a restaurant.
2nd date: You take her to an expensive restaurant.
3rd date: You take her to a very expensive restaurant and buy her a diamond necklace. You get to hold her hand later that night.
[I]
Indian girl
1st date: You meet her parents.
2nd date: She meets your parents.
3rd date: Wedding night.
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A Chinese, a Malay and an Indian were on a plane about to crash.
They have 4 seconds to jump out of the plane before it crashes.
They decided to count to three and jump out of the plane.
However, only the Chinese survived. Why?
Ans:
Chinese: yi , er , san (out of the plane in 3 seconds)
Malay: sa-tu , du-a , CRASH!!
Indian: on-ne , ren-ne , CRASH!!
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A Korean guy ask God
"God when will Korea wins the World cup"
God said
"50 years"
The Korean Guy cried because he wont live to see his country team wins
A Singaporean guy ask God
"God when will Singapore wins the world cup"
God said
"100 years"
The Singaporean guy cried because he and his son wont live to see his country team wins.
A Malaysian guy ask God
"God when will Malaysia wins the world cup"
God cried instead.
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One day a chinese, malay, and indian guy died and went to heaven. The guardian of heavens gates said that heaven was overpopulated and he can only let a person in if they are truly and purely holy.To determined whether they are holy enuf or not they had to climb the "100 stairs of dirty jokes" where at every step an angel will appear and tell them a dirty joke,if they can climb the stairs without laughing at any of the jokes they would be able to enter heaven.
So the malay guy started first....on the 3rd step he laughed and *BOOM* was sent to hell
2nd the indian guy went......on the 40th step the laugh so loud he craped his pants *BOOM* he was sent to hell
Finally it was the Chinese guys turn....he climbed climbed and climbed without laughing at any of the jokes...amazingly he made it to the 99th step!! 1 more to go and he would make it to heaven. BUT as he was going to climb the final step he laughed out loud and *BOOM* was send to hell
The Malay and indian guy in hell was confused and ask him why did he laugh!! he was to close to getting into heaven
The chinese guy said :" i finally understood the first joke"
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What do you call an englishman with a sword?
- a knight
What do you call a japanese man with a sword?
- a samurai
What do you call an indian man with a sword?
Ans:
A grass-cutter
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